I am the love of my life

 I am the love of my life

       Janiel mae Lopez  

 

 

I keep searching for something or someone or anything to love to feel alive and i just have to stare at the mirror and laugh how stupid to not realize i am the love of my life all along. Seeking love from others was thrilling yet so self doubting of will i ever be enough. Paranoid from the future until it will pass me by. 

When i think about every fixation or obsession i had with something or someone is because i see myself in it. At the end of the day i love them because they are like a mirror with different bodies. 

So when i stop it i start seeing the good and the bad traits i have to work on. like a molded clay i change and i change even if i don't prefer too. But the temperature is rising and i might just start melting. 

Like the song chest pain with the lyrics  i love i loveeeee i love i love. And that's how i function i love my coffee in the morning , i love books and paintings, And i love everything old and new. I love working hard but i also love comfort to rest with my comfy blanket. I love staring at the cloudy sky make up some shapes in my mind and capture the moon's essence at night to feel like the universe is lighting me up in the dark side of everything.

I love to learn every language to just know why without asking. 

I love seeing people truly live and love 

I'm starting to love and love myself may it be the divine power of realization  or my pineal gland finally working in balance with my spirit. 

I started smiling to myself because it feels too good to know that i love myself genuinely. And i know that the universe and god is kinda proud of me. Because i know i am. 

 I love.